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Apparantly I'm an Exhibitionist Now

I feel like a good way to start this post is by saying that we don't have curtains. You might be able to guess where this is going, and you're right. It's not good.

On the schedule today was an 8 mile run, which I hopped on the treadmill for this morning. It faces outside and I got to watch the bobcat (machine, not animal) loading up gravel to put around the back of the house. When I started I was wearing a sports bra and shorts, my normal indoor at home running gear. The driver was way off in the distance so I felt fine.

Attire = standard. Pose = unusual.
After a while the driver starts getting closer and closer, until finally he's RIGHT in front of the window. Like, 2 feet in front of me. As I run and he dumps gravel. At first I was a little uncomfortable but then a rap song came on and I started thinking "make it rain" as he poured the gravel down and I forgot I was baring my white stomach to the world (AKA one man).  Crisis averted.


 

Fast forward about 30 minutes. I head to the shower (at the OTHER side of the house) because, duh, that's what sweaty people do post-run. I have an awesome shower and then start singing to myself as I towel off. And then I make eye contact with the gravel guy, who just happens to be walking around the back of the house.

Did I mention I was nude? I did? Ok. So I did what anyone would do in my position and jumped back into the shower. And waited there for several minutes hoping that it didn't happen. No dice. I kept peeking out and realized that hubby and gravel man were just chilling in front of the window having a conversation. Awesome.

If you were waiting for a point to the story - sorry. But I do have a moral for you. No matter how nice it is to live in the boonies with lots of windows and no curtains...get them anyway. The end.

I should write a children's book. I could create some awesome morals for stories. Examples:

"And that's how the little runner girl learned that curry was not a good pre-race meal."
"So Bobby never, ever went into the women's locker room every again."
"Remember that even if you think your trip to the toilet was interesting, it's not polite to talk about it at dinner."

Plus, I can draw (evidence HERE).

Where is my book deal? I'm the package deal!

Do you have curtains/blinds on your windows? What wakes you - alarm or sun?
Neither right now. At first because it was cheap, but now I actually prefer it most of the time. Today, of course, being the exception.

Is there a difference between what you wear to run in public vs. alone?
I usually wear a sports bra to run at home, but there is no way I would do that in public. Mostly it's because it's one less thing to wash when I'm just on the treadmill.  

Comments

  1. LOL This is fantastic. Seriously. Only because it didn't happen to me.

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  2. Hahahaha oh my....you are just too funny!! I live on a busy street so there are shutters everywhere! I usually leave mine a crack open so the sun can wake me...unless I have to be up earlier than sunrise. Then it's all about the alarm!

    I have been wearing my extra crappy clothes to run in on the TM at home. What I run in outside isn't spectacular but the stuff I'm in at home is just one grade below!!

    Let me know when you write that book! I'll definitely buy one ;)

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  3. We have curtains on some windows... they are $$$! We just moved in May and so we are slowly getting curtains and blinds. We don't have them in our bedroom and my hubby is always yelling at me to GET AWAY FROM THE WINDOW WHEN YOU CHANGE!! I'm always like, no one's looking! Haha... seriously we argue about it almost every day. It's funny. Glad I'm not the only one.

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  4. So...did the dude see you naked? I feel like if he's standing there with your husband when that happens, he would want to crawl into a hole in the ground.

    Also, I usually run wearing a shirt on the treadmill. Without that, where would I blow my nose or wipe my face? Yes, I'm disgusting. :)

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  5. Soooo awkward, also, hilarious. We have curtains, but I don't close them. The house isn't very open that it matters.

    I usually run in hot pants, sports bra and t-shirt on the TM. I sweat too much not to have something there to absorb it.

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  6. bahahaha. omgggg. funniest thing i have heard in A WHILE. i keep my blinds closed pretty much all the time because i forget to think about things like who might be able to see me through the window. i know. terrible. haha.

    oh. and i am still breathing friend. barely.

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  7. I DON'T HAVE CURTAINS EITHER. and i live in manhattan. surrounded by other apartments that are very close by. and i am ALWAYS topless, for some reason (why is this?).

    i'm okay with the constant nudity because i i will never, ever meet the guy who lives on the 6th floor in the building across the street from me. but you... you are very close to your peeper. you pay that man to handle your gravel. that's CLOSE.

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  8. I used to just get dressed in front of a window in my apartment because there is just one apartment facing mine where someone could potentially see me. I figured it didn't matter, since I didn't think it was occupied.

    Well, a few days later, a guy in my Physical Chemistry class asks me where I live, and I told him. He then told me he lives right across from me, in that apartment. WHOOPS. talk about embarrassing.

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  9. I grew up in the middle of nowhere and we probably didn't need curtains but I was too terrified not to have them. I babysat for a family that didn't have curtains and when the kids went to sleep I would have to sit where my back wasn't to one of the windows. I blame all of this on watching Scream at a young age!

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  10. I only have curtains on about half of my windows but that's because I'm poor ;)

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  11. OMG LOL! I just started laughing hysterically. That is the time when you hear someone go "Awwwkkkkward....".

    I wake up to an alarm at 630 every morning. Blah. Up before the sun in this house! I have blinds and curtains on all the windows. The patio doors (which sit right next to me in the office area) used to creep me out until I finally hung up curtains.

    If I ran alone and had your body, I'd run in a sports bra too! But I work out at the gym so I wear the workout clothes that make it look like I know what I am doing :D

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  12. That is hilarious! I pretty much wear the same thing when I run indoors or out. I'm too chicken to wear just a sports bra.

    We have blinds and live on the 17th floor of an apartment building and they are rarely closed. I walk around in my towel (or less) sometimes because I'm convinced the people in the building across the street can't see me even though I can see them... Ha

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  13. I might just die of embarrassment if that happened to me.

    When I moved from the third floor to the ground floor I had to learn to stop walking around the house in my underwear...I definitely had a few slip ups and had a few "oh crap- did that person see me?" moments.

    An alarm clock wakes me up most days- but it is also dark until 7:30 right now...

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  14. Haha, very funny...well, reading it, wouldn't have been if it were me! If I'm on the treadmill, I'm in shorts and a sports bra too, definitely not a set I'd wear outside! We have curtains on most of our windows, but not all but if I were in the woods, I wouldn't have them either!

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  15. Classic. Seriously. This is the funniest thing you have ever posted. And what is wrong with a little curry? Totally a pre-race meal...

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  16. hahahaha oh man I definitely lack situational awareness sometimes too. I sincerely hope I've never been spotted naked but I kind of forget to close the curtains like...all the time and we live in the middle of a big ol' apartment complex.

    =X

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  17. I used to love running topless on the treadmill...until I got neighbors. Damn.

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  18. We don't have curtains at all, and the blinds we have are never drawn. I like windows all bare and the sunlight in. Living in high-rise buildings in Singapore, we ALWAYS have curtains and now, I am out here in the boonies of Arkansas, there is NO WAY I am having curtains!

    I like to run in my sports bra and shorts/capris when I run at home. One less thing to wash, and it is cooler. Of course, I have WAAAY more jiggly bits than yours. If I have your body, I would probably just walk around in my sports bra every day and everywhere!

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  19. i know this is probably a weird comment, but that pose is very flattering- your arms and core look ripped :)

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  20. At home I always just wear a sports bra and then whatever bottom I grab. We have curtains on all our windows, but I have been known to open them and then forget and walk in front of my windows (on a VERY busy corner) nude! So dumb (me, not you)!

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  21. lol oh no, I'm so sorry! You probably made that guys day though haha.

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  22. hahahaha everything about this post is awesome. first off, the caption under the first pic.. LOL, and then i'm giggling while he "makes it rain" with the gravel. ps. super jealous of your awesome tummy that can be exposed without a shirt. reminder to self: cut back to sweets.

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  23. Ooooooooh my gosh, I would have been mortified. I have NO idea what I would have done, except maybe just pretend that it didn't happen? I was wondering what your husband thought about the whole thing haha.

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  24. Oh my...
    That is quite the pickle you got yourself into...
    But at least it's a funny story to tell! :)

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  25. I live in the boonies too. I do sorta have some curtains (not the kind that are actually completely covering the windows) but none on the glass in my doors.

    After I run I head downstairs to my laundry room and take off my sweaty running clothes and usually slip into the bathroom upstairs quickly...naked. Enter the young reference book salesman who was knocking at the door which of course was half glass as I was trying to run up the stairs right in front of that door.

    We locked eyes and I slipped back into the laundry room and hid. I could have died!

    And when he returned days later with a sheepish grin on his face....I ended up buying an overpriced book.

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  26. I have done the EXACT SAME THING. I was doing my run on our treadmill upstairs, then turned on the shower and came downstairs to refill my water bottle. I walked through the kitchen naked then went back upstairs. Then I remembered it was Wednesday and the lawn guys were in the backyard mowing. And we don't have curtains or blinds on our back door. So, you are not alone.

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  27. Your timing is impeccable on this one! We don't have curtains on our windows either and like you we are out in the boonies. But tonight I'm home by myself since the hubs is on a business trip and I really, really wish I had curtains! Isn't that weird? I keep feeling like someone is looking in. I'm paranoid I know.
    I would never wear to the gym what I wear at home either. Usually sports bra and shorty shorts just because it's comfortable, cooler, and less laundry. :)

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  28. We took our ugly colored blinds...as in pink and green...down and didn't replace them forever! I would make sure to always have something covering the important parts during the day and at night, just made sure no lights were on! We now have curtains...way nicer! Plus they keep the house a lot warmer!

    When I workout at home...it's totally different...not shirt, just sports bra and workout pants! Why wear anything else?

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  29. The main part of our house used to face into the back yard and there was just a green belt of forest for 140 feet behind us so we didn't have curtains on our full wall window back there. I loved it and used to want to sleep on the floor - in the winter the moonlight was so beautiful.

    Funny girl, You!

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  30. how can i not first acknowledge HOLY HOTNESS!!! ;) dang girl, way to strike a pose and one-up madonna! :)

    umm, but even the awesomest looking runnerchicks do NOT want to be on display in front of the gravel guy!! oh man...u poor thing!! i see a book deal in the making, sage advice. :)

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  31. I vacationed in Key West about a year ago and the house we stayed in had now blinds or curtains. The owner of the house said that the windows were tinted so that nobody could see in, so obviously I would walk around the room nude after my shower...no problem. Until my dad told me that if it's dark out and the lights are on inside you could toally see everything inside the house!! So whenever I was getting changed for bed I would duck down really low so that nobody would be able to see me haha. My dad made a suggestion to the owner that he put blinds on the windows but they guy said that it would take away from the Key West vibe of the house....bs

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  32. I definitely wear less when I am running on my treadmill than when I am running outside in public. I live in a town house, and our neighbor's windows are directly across from ours. So I have bamboo blinds up.

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  33. hahah! This sucks! I have no other words for you!

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  34. Oh my gosh this was a funny post. You actually made me laugh out loud! That is too bad about gravel man. No fun! I have blinds on my windows but no curtains. I don't have a treadmill in my house so I wear the same stuff no matter where I am. However, I do tend to try to match my tops and shorts when I'm heading to the gym or outside as opposed to the treadmill in my building where I will wear a red shirt and pink and purple checkered shorts (this was my outfit last night!).

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  35. hahahahaha - I realized my bedroom window is directly across from another building's and I like to walk around either half or not dressed while picking out outfits and Tripp pointed it out to me the other day as he saw me coming and shut the shades (yes, I have shades, but I like them open so I get more light in) - I have lived there for a year and a half now...#fail

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  36. ba ha ha ha ha! This made my entire day. You look freaking amazing btw. Holy crud I want your body. Dang girlie you are definitely doing something right. :)

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  37. I loved this.


    seriously loved. I wouldn't have cared at all. especially if Colin was there. I wonder if he did see.....I wonder if he said anything to Tim ;)

    and I love your running outfit pose.....and girl you are sexy! I'm sure it was invigorating!!! being naked like that. enjoy your body while you can ;)

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  38. We have curtains, but I absent mindedly leave the open, and I walk around naked post shower a lot. If people can see through our tree and screen and still get too much of an eye full of me naked, it's no skin off my nose.

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  39. I'd buy your childrens books...LOL!

    We have blinds, but I guess I'll be getting something MUCH thicker! Ha!! love the running outfit pose...priceless and if I posed like that, it would be scary...very scary!

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  40. Oh, that is funny.

    1. Love your pose.
    2.If I had your bod, I wouldn't worry about wearing workout bra and pants. Heck, I can't wait until next week when I get a t'mill in the house! shorts and jog bra, shirts are outside accessories.

    3. We a) have the curtains that came iwth the house in the living room. Those things are expensive to replace, we don't really care, they're brown and beige.
    3b) We don't have curtains above the kitchen sink. I often walk through the kitchen to get the laundry room with just bra or without bra.
    Last night I came home and dh was neked in the laundry room and he said,"you probably saw my b** from outside". I didn't, 'cause I wasn't looking in that window, but now I wonder if I could have. hmm.

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  41. I definitely have blinds and curtains, I live in a townhome so my neighbors are really close and I don't like nosey neighbors lol You totally crack me up!

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  42. ok your body rocks so the running part seems like no biggie..the shower..EEIIK!!

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