Twas the Night Before Race Day...

T-minus 17 hours until my half marathon in the morning! I happen to know quite a few of you are gearing up for all sorts of races this weekend, so I thought this little poem might be appropriate for us all. For the record--this is what happens when you don't have television. Hubs and I spent a somewhat embarrassing couple of hours doing this early in the morning after my family headed off to the airport. Once again, I'm convinced I've found my true love because I can't imagine ANY other grown man spending that much time helping me rhyme. Love you, Tim!

Twas the night before race day, and all through the home

There was stretching and rolling, on rods made of foam

Compression stockings were placed on their calves with such care

In the hopes that on race day, no pain would be there.

The runners were nestled all snug in their beds

While PRs and course records danced in their heads.

Laying out was my jacket, my shoes and my cap

I’ll be cold at the start, but warmer each lap

When at the wall socket there arose such a clatter

I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Off in the darkness a blue light did flash

A fully charged Garmin to record my dash

 I looked out my window and saw only snow 

Which meant running in temps far less than zero

I shivered and thought of a race all gone wrong

So I checked one more time on Weather.com


The forecast was dismal, gloomy and cold

With gusting wind of speeds untold

For a prediction of fifties, clear skies and sunny

I’d have given each cent of my hard earned money

Now, left leg, now right leg, now tight IT band!

Now bum knee, now shin splints, go away on command!

I’ve got a full race to run, and I want to BQ

If you all work together we just might squeeze through.

Counting out each mile, one split at a time

If I time it all right a PR would be mine

Pushing the pace for negative splits

But no matter my time, I won’t call it quits.

I’ll spring to my feet when the alarm starts to ring

I need way more sleep but I’d rather have bling. 

I gobble up bagels, oatmeal and Gu,

Down two cups of coffee and head to the loo. 

A speech, the anthem, a prayer for good luck

Either way by mile 20 it’s still gonna suck!

The race director exclaimed, as we started our run:

“Good luck to you all-this is supposed to be fun!”

Yes, I plan on quitting my job to become a full-time bad poetry writer. If any of you complain about my lack of verses (did you know the original has like 20?) I will never forgive you. 

Tomorrow morning I'm running the Dalton Red Carpet Half Marathon. I always say, "I just want to finish!" but let's be honest--I'm human, and I have a little ambition. Yes, finishing is my first goal. But I also have a little dream for a sub-2. In good conditions, it could happen, so that's what I'm hoping for. Weather should be clear and 49 degrees at the start, warming up to 55 at the end. Can't beat that, can you?

Rock and Roll races may have crazy headlining artists but here in our neck of the woods, we get a band that was famous 20 years ago-Sister Hazel. I'm not complaining, because my musical tastes got stuck in the 90s. So my other secret goal is to stay awake after the race until 9pm when the concert ends and the fireworks start. 

So, to recap, my goals are:

-Finish (alive)

-Finish under 2 hours (also, still alive)

-Stay awake until the concert.

Wish me luck on all three. 

When you run a race, do you set multiple goals for yourself?     

Yes, yes yes! Definitely. I usually have an easy goal, and one that is tougher but not totally out of my league.

Anyone else racing this weekend? Let me know so I can wish you luck!